We all have different opinions... - Page 3 - Betta Fish and Betta Fish Care
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post #21 of 59 (permalink) Old 08-01-2012, 10:01 AM
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If somebody's posting "my fish is lying at the bottom of his bowl dying, I keep him in half a gallon and change the water fortnightly, I don't know what's wrong" -- I am going to tell them exactly what's wrong.

I disagree with flaming, but if it will make any difference to a fish's life, I will speak the truth. No need to be rude about it, but I'm not going to stop and think about how I might sugarcoat things to save somebody's widdle feewings when their fish is suffocating rapidly in its own pee or dying of an infection.

I think a few folks get hurty-wurty when they're given a wake up call that they're not taking as good care of their pets as they thought, and this is why Cuddles the Fish is covered in rot and ulcers... And that's an understandable reaction, but hey - we all give our time and advice for free here. Take it with the lumps, I reckon, and remember to say thanks...

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post #22 of 59 (permalink) Old 08-01-2012, 11:04 AM Thread Starter
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Quote:
Originally Posted by aokashi View Post
+1
It's more important to educate people I think and leave themselves to judge and do things their own way based on that information...
what I usually cant stand is personal opinion being strutted around as fact with no factual basis :/ that's when arguments really begin


And totally derailing, but dq, what tail type is the guy in your profile picture?
Exactly aokashi...I have 4 bettas all in different size tanks. My "Beau" had to be taken OUT of a 5.5g because the larger area was just too stressful for him, he is in a 1g bowl and is thriving now, calm and eating. And like you said it is personal opinion on what is best, and what people are able to handle. It shouldn't be harped on as much as it is..just sayin'.

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post #23 of 59 (permalink) Old 08-01-2012, 11:07 AM Thread Starter
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Originally Posted by Aus View Post
If somebody's posting "my fish is lying at the bottom of his bowl dying, I keep him in half a gallon and change the water fortnightly, I don't know what's wrong" -- I am going to tell them exactly what's wrong.

I disagree with flaming, but if it will make any difference to a fish's life, I will speak the truth. No need to be rude about it, but I'm not going to stop and think about how I might sugarcoat things to save somebody's widdle feewings when their fish is suffocating rapidly in its own pee or dying of an infection.

I think a few folks get hurty-wurty when they're given a wake up call that they're not taking as good care of their pets as they thought, and this is why Cuddles the Fish is covered in rot and ulcers... And that's an understandable reaction, but hey - we all give our time and advice for free here. Take it with the lumps, I reckon, and remember to say thanks...
You are proving my point exactly...obviously that would be a tank problem. I am talking about people asking for help in other areas and people constantly saying things like, "I would never use any tank under 5g" etc. It just is not helpful, encouraging, nor productive. And being kind is not sugarcoating, it's just being polite and mature.

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post #24 of 59 (permalink) Old 08-01-2012, 11:15 AM
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This is the internet, not many people care to be polite. Sad but true.
Also since our opinions are transpired in written word it is difficult to understand the tone sometimes.

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post #25 of 59 (permalink) Old 08-01-2012, 11:48 AM
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And being kind is not sugarcoating, it's just being polite and mature.
I would argue that sugarcoating is actually far from being kind.

But as the thread title says, "We all have different opinions".

And really? The people keeping their bettas in 1 gallon bowls and keeping them super healthy and happy are the vast minority. The sick betta forum is over-run with bettas in tiny bowls, and the number 1 reason those fish are sick is poor water quality.

I do not advocate rudeness. But I do understand the other side of your complaint, people becoming dismayed and frustrated at seeing the same thing - and bettas suffering because of it - over and again. And tbh, I think a few people need a sharp wake-up call where care for their pets is concerned, because they actually are bad pet owners.

I just think the best thing to do is speak your mind - politely - and maybe avoid making a big drama circus tent out of a fish forum, where you can help it..

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post #26 of 59 (permalink) Old 08-01-2012, 12:36 PM
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Man, I give upgrade advice in the lounge. lol

This is my reasoning. When I first started with betta fish, I listened to the petstore guy and got a 1/2 gallon betta kit. I noticed the fish didn't do anything but lay on his side, so I did research after the fact and realized I needed to upgraded to a 1 gallon. If the site didn't list 1-3 gallon as suggested tank size for bettas, I'd think bettas where the frailest fish on earth. So, I mention that 1-3 gallons is a healthy amount of water to house a betta in to spread the word.

If my Camry kept bursting into flames every time I turned on the engine, I would get a new car. If my AC made my appartment hot instead of cold, I would get a new AC. My 1 gallon tanks had an ammonia spike and temperature drop on the same night which caused my fish to be sluggish, not eat or poop, be very pale, and clamp there fins. As temperary fixes I brought a mini heater and started to do more partial water changes. But in the end, the only real fix was to adjust my set up for my new life. So, I upgrade to cycled 5 gallon tanks for the sake of stability.

In the end, I could just answer the person's immediate question and leave it at that. But why hand someone who needs stitches a bandaid? Some people really do have to fix their setups to keep their fish healthy. -_-

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post #27 of 59 (permalink) Old 08-01-2012, 12:47 PM
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I do see what you're saying bettanewbie.
What's sad is some people argue with your advice or ignore your advice no matter how sugar-coated-with-a-cherry-on-top it is.

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post #28 of 59 (permalink) Old 08-01-2012, 12:55 PM
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First: I just love this thread! I have had too many incidents on another forum where people have driven away people because of their "you need a bigger tank ASAP! And why the h*ll did you get a bala shark for a 5g tank? They need 150g!". That's not going to help the person, or convert them to the fishy side of things

Second: I agree with Aus that people usually need a jolt of 'man-you're killing your fish in that .25g tank!' but there doesn't need to be a chorist of the same thing. Once something is said, it's said let it go. There's little we can do to get them switch, if they don't listen the first or second time they're not going to listen. The main issue is to get the first issue solved, then go back to the other issues later once the betta is not in peril.

But hey, that's my opinion

The best way to help is to be forgiving. People aren't made with a book of ultimate information in their head. We need to inform, not insult; give advice, not lectures; and realize we're all human and we all make mistakes
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post #29 of 59 (permalink) Old 08-01-2012, 01:10 PM
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^ + 1

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post #30 of 59 (permalink) Old 08-01-2012, 01:22 PM Thread Starter
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Originally Posted by Desstai View Post
I agree. Yes, I think that small tank size is an issue, but the more important issue at hand is getting them the help they need. Bettas can be kept in smaller containers so I think stating what needs to be done in their situation is better than stating that they need to go out and buy a new tank as the only solution.

I don't know... maybe I'm bitter because I've had a LOT of trouble (not on this site yet) with people saying that I abuse my fish because they are in 2 gallon tanks and not 5 gallon tanks >_>; and my fish aren't even sick. I just told someone my tank sizes and the hate flame rained down from the sky......
This is my point for this thread exactly....opinions are just that, and there are so many different ones. Let's stick to helping with facts and leave our opinions to ourselves.

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