Need a Bit of Emotional Help... - Betta Fish and Betta Fish Care
 
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post #1 of 10 (permalink) Old 08-17-2012, 09:54 PM Thread Starter
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Need a Bit of Emotional Help...

I doubt this belongs in "Betta Memorials", but mods, feel free to move it if it needs to happen.

Today, I found my very first fish, the one who started it all, Sally, laying on the floor in front of her tank... I screamed and went into hysterics, and my dad had to hold me for an hour before I could compose myself enough to go with him to the backyard to bury her.

Now that you all think I'm a psycho and need to be locked up, I kind of need some help... I can't walk into my bed room and face my other three fish and that big empty tank... For some reason, I think Lysander is angry about it. I know it sounds crazy, and fish don't feel the way we do, but I really feel that way... His tank was right next to hers, separated by a washcloth but I know that they knew that each other were there. I took down the washcloth and walked away from him, and he just kind of... fell. Like his whole demeanor seemed to change. Maybe he was just kind of shocked that she wasn't wiggling around in her tank like she always was when the washcloth would fall on accident. Maybe he just lost his reason to blow bubble nests and act playful.

The other two didn't seem to change at all. I went around to make sure that my dad had closed their tank lids, unlike Sally's, then left to go bury Sally... I can't bring myself to go in and empty her tank. I would like to put Lysander in it, since he's so energetic and he's in a 1 gallon. Her tank was a 2.5 gallon.

She was my baby... I feel like a part of me has been taken away. I can't imagine going on without her beside me. She had more personality than a lot of people. I talked to her when I needed someone to talk to, and even though she couldn't understand it was just helpful... I love her with all of my heart.

Sally, I will always love you. You were my babygirl and the gateway to my bettabug. Thank you.
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post #2 of 10 (permalink) Old 08-17-2012, 10:00 PM
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((((Purple)))) I am so sorry hon..Is there any way your dad can go in and take the tank out and empty it for now? I know this is very hard for you, and wish I had something else to say to make you feel better...more hugs.

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post #3 of 10 (permalink) Old 08-17-2012, 10:03 PM
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I'm sorry hun :( it gets easier.. try and think that you gave her a happy life that not alot of bettas get to know
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post #4 of 10 (permalink) Old 08-17-2012, 10:05 PM
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I am so sorry! At least she had a good life! And she will always have a place in your heart. I agree about seeing if your dad will empty the tank for you, and maybe put it away somewhere so you wont have to see it for a little while. Or if you are feeling up to it, sometimes a new buddy can help.

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post #5 of 10 (permalink) Old 08-17-2012, 10:07 PM Thread Starter
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Originally Posted by Bettanewbie60 View Post
((((Purple)))) I am so sorry hon..Is there any way your dad can go in and take the tank out and empty it for now? I know this is very hard for you, and wish I had something else to say to make you feel better...more hugs.
I didn't think about that. I doubt he would be able to do it, as it is a lot of work, but I'll ask him to go with me tomorrow.

On the bright side, I think I might finally get a sorority, which I've been dreaming of ever since I first found this site. Also, my dad learned why it's important to close the lids after he feeds the fish for me... It's unfortunate that he had to learn this way, though.

Sally, I will always love you. You were my babygirl and the gateway to my bettabug. Thank you.
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post #6 of 10 (permalink) Old 08-17-2012, 10:10 PM
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Originally Posted by Purple View Post
I didn't think about that. I doubt he would be able to do it, as it is a lot of work, but I'll ask him to go with me tomorrow.

On the bright side, I think I might finally get a sorority, which I've been dreaming of ever since I first found this site. Also, my dad learned why it's important to close the lids after he feeds the fish for me... It's unfortunate that he had to learn this way, though.
Yeah, I'm sure your dad must feel horrible too...hugs for both of you!

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post #7 of 10 (permalink) Old 08-17-2012, 10:28 PM
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Awww thats horrible! Poor Sally, but she's in fishy heaven now, swimming with no worries or cares. I hope it all works out for you and your Dad! *Hug*

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post #8 of 10 (permalink) Old 08-20-2012, 12:50 AM
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You have my condolences.

It took me 4 years to get back into betta keeping after my 5 finally passed away (they each lived about 4 years).

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post #9 of 10 (permalink) Old 08-20-2012, 01:04 AM
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Unfortunately, I have lost more fish than I care to admit through jumping even when I have used lids and cling wrap over the tanks. I feel like a murderer every time I find one dried up on the floor but really, there is nothing you can do to prevent it.

I have had one of my most prized bettas jump out during a water change and I didn't find him until it was too late. I bawled my eyes out over him as he was my holy grail of bettas and I kept thinking what if I had done something different or thought to check he was there before putting the lid on.

It's no use beating yourself up over it. Jumping is a natural behaviour and I'm sure at least most people on this forum have been in the same position you are.

You do get over it, but it is still a horrible lesson to have to learn. Hopefully you find another special fish to fill that hole in your heart. Just try not to be too hard on yourself about it in the mean time.


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post #10 of 10 (permalink) Old 08-20-2012, 11:51 PM
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So sorry i can't imagine what i would do if i lost magic my veil tail betta i have had him for not even a year and is the love of my life i use to put him in a small tank and put him on the table by the couch so i could watch TV with him he is my first betta and i love him. feel so sorry for you :(
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