Don't hate me. (big rant) - Betta Fish and Betta Fish Care
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post #1 of 56 (permalink) Old 03-19-2011, 09:28 PM Thread Starter
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Don't hate me. (big rant)

Before you jump at me, please know this is not directed at all members nor is it directed at anyone in particular.
Also, this rant came out bigger then I thought. Be prepared for a long read.

I'm not very happy with this site lately, since I've joined, its gotten harsher on some of the comments.

Me and my friend joined in hopes of meeting nice people who we could share our fish love with and learn from each other.

Looks like we pecked into the wrong site. My friends deleted her albums and is calling it quit, because several members I won't mention jabbed at her when all she really asked was if it was safe to put her pearl gourami in with her bettas.

Now I understand that everyone wants the fish to be happy and healthy, I do as well, and so does she. She has alot of experience with fish keeping.

Might I just add that what the people said about the pearl gourami is false, they are not aggressive, she's looked it up, looked in books, and even asked a person who breeds them. She has a female and they are shy and timid, only the males are aggressive, and that's dearing breeding.

This site has took a turn down harsh ally on the newbies who come in, and I'm not liking it. I can understand it if they do something stupid like put a male and female together to breed and then take off for a 2 week vacation or something.

But honestly, over a pearl gourami? Over 3 guppies and 2 female bettas? Not all fish have it drilled into they're brain to kill.

The two female betta inquired have kept together since the first of March, and then her grandfather has 3 in a 5gal tank, if there was anyone going to die it'd happen already.

Keeping the two girls together with three male guppies is the same as a sorority. By the time they think about fighting and square off, here comes a guppy and they forget. Chill out people.

Not all bettas attack guppies either, I kept a male betta and a male guppy together for over a year, and my betta never once tried to attack the little guy, even when he was a fry. Infact, they were buddies. Fish can form friendships, and thats what these two females have done.

Now for the ghost fish. Don't believe what the pet stores tell you. They'll most likely (90% of the time) do whatever it takes for you to buy either the biggest tank or whatever, because this means better sales for the shop, and probably a better paycheck for them. OR they just want to seem smart. (just because someone works in a video game shop doesn't mean they know alot about them)

Not all fish needs schools. I have two examples I have personally owned.

One, a corycat. They are supposed to be in schools of 3 or more? Maybe for most, but I've had two albino cory's (at two different times) who got on fine without any others, and they were quite happy.

Another was with a neon tetra, while I'm not certain on the schooling amount. I had ONE neon tetra, in a 50 gallon, with a giant angel fish, a giant pleco, and a good sized red tailed shark. And it lived for a good year and a half...then I moved away, so I don't know what happened after that, but still. A tiny neon tetra with those giant fish? They didn't pick on the little guy at all, infact, the angelfish adored him, and not in the food way.

Yes, fish can't tell us how they feel, but there is body language. I've grown up with many, many animals, and I've come to learn many different forms of happiness, illness, being frightened, and everything else.

Hamsters, gerbils, cats, dogs, several types of birds, goats, chickens, ducks, guinea pigs, fish and frogs. And even though I've never owned one, horses. (I lived next to some and helped take care of them)

I am familiar with the body language and expression of animals. Don't say I don't know what I'm talking about, though I could probably be proven wrong, I don't claim to be an expert.

I feel I've ranted enough to the members of this site.
I would really appreciate it if you guys would just say "No, <fishnamehere> can't be kept with bettas. Also, I would suggested getting a bigger tank soon, also separate the females or get 3 more females."

Don't just go "No, <fishnamehere> can't be kept with bettas, the breed is aggressive. Also, your tank is to crowded! Your fish are going to kill each other!!! You need to <insert stuff about seperating and bigger tanks or taking them back to the petstore here>"

There is a proper and non-proper way of telling people how to care for fish.
Now, I'm going to go cheer my friend up.

Not everyone on this site lives a money-filled life, living with fiancee', parents, or in college dorms. While there's nothing wrong with it. But some of us our on the edge due to reasons we didn't choose (I'm living in the poor house because my dad decided he didn't care about me and my mom and left us to starve and and freeze, I lost all of my precious fish to him)

And ALOT of us don't have petshops just in town or down the street. The closet pet shop that carries supplies and fish for me is over an hour away, and I can't go there.

We all raise our fish differently. Heck, people are breeding and keeping they're betta's in rubbermaid bins!!!! And people are fine with it! Which, I'm fine with it too.

But really, everyone who reads this, chill out for the sake of the newbies.

To people who found this harsh, mean, cruel, or whatever. I only spoke the truth the way I've seen it.

Side note: You can't save every betta fish in the world, I don't blame you for trying though, but this is the internet, you can only try so hard, any harder and you come off being mean.
Think of all the betta fish and other pet fish that died in Japan this recent week.

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Sunkist and Eros

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post #2 of 56 (permalink) Old 03-19-2011, 09:37 PM
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i know, i can come off as harsh sometimes, but i don't mean it. when people say "(x-fish) can't be kept with bettas", it's usually because they've seen what can, and more often than not will happen. i had three gups, living in a divided 10 gallon with a male betta. one day, the betta somehow was over on the gup's side, and attacked my favorite. for no reason. he'd been living fine next to them, showing little, if any interest in them.

i've only seen the users here, be harsh on people who don't listen. if we give you advice, and you do the opposite repeatedly, yeah. we're gonna get harsh on you. because we're sick of giving you advice, and you throw it in our faces. thankfully, i've only seen three users get the harsh treatment on here. the users are pretty nice, otherwise.
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post #3 of 56 (permalink) Old 03-19-2011, 09:42 PM
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I may be a bit too harsh sometimes, but I don't mean to be. Really. I'm sorry if I come off that way. I sometimes don't think about the PERSON'S feelings because I'm thinking about the fish, since they don't have a voice.

Sequin (m), Shortcake (f), Westley (m), and Sir Righty of Walton (m).
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post #4 of 56 (permalink) Old 03-19-2011, 09:53 PM Thread Starter
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Luimeril View Post
i've only seen the users here, be harsh on people who don't listen. if we give you advice, and you do the opposite repeatedly, yeah. we're gonna get harsh on you. because we're sick of giving you advice, and you throw it in our faces. thankfully, i've only seen three users get the harsh treatment on here. the users are pretty nice, otherwise.
I understand and respect that. If the person your giving advice to doesn't listen, sometimes you do need to get rough with them.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sweeda88 View Post
I may be a bit too harsh sometimes, but I don't mean to be. Really. I'm sorry if I come off that way. I sometimes don't think about the PERSON'S feelings because I'm thinking about the fish, since they don't have a voice.
I understand, I think you should say that to BlakbirdxGyarados too.

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post #5 of 56 (permalink) Old 03-19-2011, 10:07 PM
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I understand about why people get harsh. I remember reading one old thread where the person was trying to breed betta fish but didn't post information on their problem, nor would they give straight answers. I got a bit lost in reading it all (it was a lot of pages lol) but I understood it. Personally, I'd not get harsh no matter how dodging the person is to questions... though I'm likely to make a few sarcastic comments, I know that a person's feelings reflect on how well they take care of their fish. So overall, I stay a happy person when lending advice to even the most reclusive users.


If I feel bad (and I've been going through a lot lately), I'm less likely to take better care of my fish. I still do everything I need to such as water changes or feeding, but I'm not likely to watch, play, talk, or whatever with them. They end up simply being fish, like any other regular Joe would see them.


I care about my fish more than anything. They're honestly all I have since I moved here to Florida and have no friends. I'll really miss them when I go to train for the military, too, but I know they'll be in good hands with someone who already is caring for approx. 200+ guppies, four bettas, and a few algae eaters.
I also understand they don't have a voice. But as LN93 said, body language can say a lot too. And as long as I've had my fish and as long as I've been dealing with aquarium animals, I'm sure I can understand them. But then, no one's perfect.

LittleNibbles93's said a lot I don't have the heart or mind to say lately.
And it's not exactly fun to come back to bettafish.com and have a friendly site suddenly turn foul. Apparently being offline for a while just to spend time with family, fish, and Samm was a bad idea.

LN93, I'm not calling it quits. Not completely.
I'm no longer going to offer my fishes personalities, lives, or anything on here other than what I've already done. I'll only offer advice and maybe a few compliments here and there for new betta photos.
Because I find out the hard way that I should never listen to Bettafish.com users for advice on other fish. Researching on my own seems a lot more harmless and easier anyway.

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post #6 of 56 (permalink) Old 03-19-2011, 10:31 PM
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Lol I think that thread you read by the individual, that has got to be a troll, has worked quite a few members up. Now whenever we see the same question we can't help but think about that jerk! I agree that the overall comment tone has changed after so and so posted their breeding threads. Maybe just some cool down time is needed??


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post #7 of 56 (permalink) Old 03-19-2011, 10:33 PM
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I understand and agree with what you say. Honestly though, this is an extremely nice and tolerant forum as far as forums go. And just to add some of my 2 cents about when a poster asks a question or shares a picture and gets criticism-

Many people here are newbies or get sucked in to what pet stores tell you about fish. If someone posts a pic of their betta in a 2 gallon tank with a snail, and a school of neons, people will say it is too small. That person may think they have the facts, but they don't. In this case I don't think it is a bad thing.

This is a place where people help other people. I agree whole heartedly that it should be said nicely, but if a major mistake is being made, I think it should be told. I would hope if I was making a glaring mistake that someone would tell me so I could fix it.

Tanks- 55 gal(in progress)-Common pleco, Angels, lemon and rummynose tetra, blue rams; 29 gal planted- rasboras, corys, otos, clown plec, shrimp; 10 gal- juvenile goldfish; 6 gal planted- betta

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post #8 of 56 (permalink) Old 03-19-2011, 10:36 PM Thread Starter
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Quote:
Originally Posted by monroe0704 View Post
Lol I think that thread you read by the individual, that has got to be a troll, has worked quite a few members up. Now whenever we see the same question we can't help but think about that jerk! I agree that the overall comment tone has changed after so and so posted their breeding threads. Maybe just some cool down time is needed??
You have a point, and I agree. I got alittle worked up myself.

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post #9 of 56 (permalink) Old 03-19-2011, 11:22 PM
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+1 to everyone else. However, neon's, corydoras, and glass catfish really need schools. They may seem fine without them, but why not give them the best happiness levels? In the wild they school for a reason, and just because they are no longer in the wild doesn't mean they lose their instincts. I don't mean to sound harsh.

I only have 1 betta left, but he's a cool blue marble!
皆さん、こんにちは!私は一匹のベタを飼っています。
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post #10 of 56 (permalink) Old 03-19-2011, 11:32 PM Thread Starter
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Originally Posted by shinybetta View Post
+1 to everyone else. However, neon's, corydoras, and glass catfish really need schools. They may seem fine without them, but why not give them the best happiness levels? In the wild they school for a reason, and just because they are no longer in the wild doesn't mean they lose their instincts. I don't mean to sound harsh.
I wasn't saying they shouldn't be kept in schools, I was just saying not all of them may like it.

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