What is funny is that I don't get enough sleep, and I am so tired I could end up falling asleep in the middle of the day, but I don't allow myself to so I can fall asleep at night. Yet, I cannot seem to go to bed at a decent hour and then regardless of when I get to bed, early or late, it always has taken me between half an hour to 1+ hrs. to fall asleep.
I do get REM sleep, cus I dream, but I am a light sleeper and the fact that BF gets up before 5am for work doesn't help. I sometimes cannot fall asleep after that and then on those days I screw up my sleep schedule cus I end up taking a nap in the middle of the day on those days (unable to stay awake). The lack of sleep is what is making my emotions worse, among other things.
I am trying to find a therapist under my insurance plans to talk through my issues, cus I am just stuck in life right now.
What would be helpful is emotional support from someone, but since they are unwilling to give it to me, I am just getting worse and worse in my moods and more anxious.
I am always cleaning. That is ALL I do. I can't get any friends to do anything with me. I try to reach out to people and they don't care about me. All they care about is themselves and so I am all alone all the time. I read on occasion.
I am hoping school keeps me busy this semester so I can just push my feelings aside and forget about them for a while.
Unfortunately, though I can implement some of those things above, it is simply not helpful cus those aren't the issues I need to resolve. :(
I really appreciate the support from someone at least (sighh.. I really hate the sound of my whining...>.<).
1 Doberman Mix: Emmy, 2 DSH Cats: Rowan & Jacob, 1 Bearded Dragon: Rainier (aka Mista Lizad Man), 1 Eastern Box Turtle: Greta, Two 5g tanks: Alchemy (Halfmoon) and Custard (Yellow VT)