A betta's journey, a story i made. - Betta Fish and Betta Fish Care
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post #1 of 13 (permalink) Old 10-11-2011, 05:52 PM Thread Starter
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Talking A betta's journey, a story i made.

Here i am, sitting in a small cup, in a Wal-mart. But i'm not like many of the other bettas; im a girl, and all the ones I see have these gorgeous, colourful fins, and they leave before i can even get to know them! Me, I've been here awhile, and i'm starting to slow down. Nowadays i just sit at the bottom of my cup, well, between the facts that I'm getting sick and that i only have a tiny bit of water to swim in, and it's so dirty that I can barely see out of it. I see people walk by all the time, but they're more interested in the bettas up at the front of the shelf, all lively and swimming about in theyre crystal-clear, full cups. The only time I get picked up is for feeding time, and- Hey! Watch it!-, sorry, i just got shoved back another space, must be some new arrivals up front... It is very dark back here, and i am getting sicker and sicker every day. I am also very bored... Then, one day, i see the cups being moved, one-by-one, and slowly the light filters through. Then, a hand reaches out and grabs my cup. Suddenly, i am brought out into the light of the store, which is a sight new to me for a while. When i look up, i notice I am in the hands of a little girl. She says, "Mommy, can we get her? PLEEEEASE?". Her mother says, "No, we don't have any room for a big fish tank, nor the money...". I saw the sadness on the girl's face, and the saleslady comes and says, "Ma'am, you don't need a tank for those. They will live perfectly fine in just a small tank like this!" And she holds up a very, VERY, tiny tank, without even any gravel at the bottom, or plants! "Oh, well then, Ok! You can get your fish, honey!"



I will continue this story tomorrow! Hope you like so far!

Dogs: Rufus
R.J.
Neige
Cats: Tabby
Beauty
Fish: Fishy
EVERYDAY I'M SHUFFLIN'
Rip Akemi.
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post #2 of 13 (permalink) Old 10-11-2011, 06:29 PM
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I like it, the sentence structure is a little choppy but I'm loving the story :D

Elrohir the plakat

Galah cockatoo & African Grey
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post #3 of 13 (permalink) Old 10-11-2011, 06:36 PM
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Makes me want to do something along these lines. I love to write. :3 Your mechanics in general could use some help. But I love the concept, and I'm more appreciative of a well thought out concept than perfection with the tiny details. <3
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post #4 of 13 (permalink) Old 10-11-2011, 07:50 PM
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I like it! Could you write more?

The Clan: Marilyn (CT) Angel (DeT) Opal (CT)
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post #5 of 13 (permalink) Old 10-12-2011, 05:43 PM Thread Starter
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Thanks guys! I'll try to be better with using paragraphs, im awful for that lol! Ok here is part 2!

I'm sitting in a car, and the water in my cup is being thrown about, and so am I. "So, you have to remember to feed this fish, and change his water.", said the girl's mother. His?! She doesn't even know I'm a girl! "I will, Mom. Do you think Tulip will like him?". 'Tulip? Who the heck is Tulip?', I thought. This was going to be a very exciting day indeed!
Many bumpy roads later, we finally stopped, and the girl picked me up and ran into a big house. I was put into what looked like her bedroom, and a minute later she returned with a box. 'Is that my new home?', I thought hopefully. I didn't want to be in this dirty water another second! Not long later, she had the tank all set up. 'Oh, how nice it'll be to be able to swim among plants and gravel! With water that i can see out of! Maybe I'll have some shells in there, or- WHOOSH!'
Suddenly, I am caught in what feels like a hurricane, and i am flipped upside down and backwards sideways, then, suddenly, it stops. I am in a tank! the first thing i do is swim. 'How good it feels to stretch my- OUCH!' I think I just hit a wall! But, that can't be right! I shrug it off and go to the bottom. 'Hey, where's all the gravel? And where's the plants? There's nothing here! I don't see a light, or even a lid on the top of my tank! 'Stop complaining!', I think to myself, 'It's better than a Walmart cup! Stop being so ungrateful!'.
"Ok, Suzie, you should only feed him about one pellet a day. They don't need much." Suzie. So that's her name. I already don't like her mother very much. I got fed more than one pellet at Walmart! I see the pellet drop to the top of my tank, and Suzie skips out with her mother behind her.
As i go to eat it, I see something walking towards my tank out of the corner of my eye. I feel something tap the top of my water. Thinking it's more food, i rush to the top. but to my surprise, it's a paw! I look out of the front of my tank, only to see a cat staring at me! And he starts drinking my water! As I get a closer look at it's collar, i see the name Tulip.
Oh, dear.

Will this (still unnamed) betta be ok in her new house? Continued in a bit!

Dogs: Rufus
R.J.
Neige
Cats: Tabby
Beauty
Fish: Fishy
EVERYDAY I'M SHUFFLIN'
Rip Akemi.
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post #6 of 13 (permalink) Old 10-12-2011, 09:09 PM
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Ooh! Me like! CONTINUE! =)

The Clan: Marilyn (CT) Angel (DeT) Opal (CT)
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post #7 of 13 (permalink) Old 10-12-2011, 09:32 PM
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I like this story. :)

*monet*Oscar*Blaze*panda*Robin*Milo*Sherlock*Flippy Picasso*August*Mr.Roboto*
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post #8 of 13 (permalink) Old 10-12-2011, 11:50 PM
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Continue please!

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post #9 of 13 (permalink) Old 10-13-2011, 12:48 AM
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Cute story!
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post #10 of 13 (permalink) Old 10-13-2011, 06:02 PM Thread Starter
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Ok here's part 3!

I just froze, and waited for this white, fluffy beast to leave. Eventually, something more interesting than me, (probably a fly), caught her attention and she ran off. Ok, NOW my water's starting to get kind of cold. And I'm getting quite bored...
~~~
Two weeks later, I am still here, but there is nothing to do so i usually just sit at the bottom of my tank, plus the cold water takes a lot of my energy away. Then, one day, I hear Suzie yell, "Uncle Davis! Come see my new fish!!". 'Finally!', I thought, 'Some company!'. I swam around my tank like a madman, ready to greet whoever walked through that door. Heck, I'd probably even welcome Tulip at this point! Suzie and a man walk in, and he looks at me with what looks like pity. See, I have yet to see a water change in my tank, so it's getting kind of cloudy in here. And I'm still on the one-pellet-a-day thing, so I'm pretty skinny, too. "Suzie, your fish looks pretty sad in this tank, look at her water! Have you cleaned her tank out yet?", the uncle said. "Ew, but Uncle Davis, there's POOP in there!", whined Suzie. Uncle Davis continued, "Well, she's also looking a bit under the weather, so why don't I bring her to my house, make her better, and bring her back. Does that sound ok?". Suzie nodded, and my tank was picked up a bit after that and brought into a car. "Poor girl, you're starving!" he whispered to my tank. Hey, HE knows I'm a girl! I think I like this guy!
The roads to his house were sort of bumpy, but when we got to his house, it was worth it! I was put into a tank that was warm, had gravel and plants, and a light with a lid! THIS was my dream tank! I swam around the tank with happiness, then I wondered what he meant when he told Suzie I looked "Under the weather". As I turn, I catch a glimpse of my tail. Hey! When did those white spots get there! Maybe THAT'S what was so itchy! He comes back with a bottle, and some food. He puts lots of food in my tank, and some blue stuff. I don't know what it is until a few days later, when my spots and itch go away. Must be medicine. But, I don't want to leave this new home!

Will she go back to Suzie? final chapter tomorrow!

Dogs: Rufus
R.J.
Neige
Cats: Tabby
Beauty
Fish: Fishy
EVERYDAY I'M SHUFFLIN'
Rip Akemi.
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