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Old 02-17-2013, 12:08 AM   #16621 
Hadoken Kitty
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Sparrow, that guy never had a course about fish. I can promise you that. I don't even have to know him to tell you that he's an imbecile. Just because he's gone to college, that does not make him a professional, nor does it make him automatically more intelligent. If he took a zoology class, they more than likely discussed a goldfish. With that being said, I can see where he would get his misinformation. However, if he had even an ounce of intelligence, he would know that these are two COMPLETELY different fish. Ignore him He is not worth your time. More than likely, he is trolling you. I had a friend's friend do this to me as well a while back, but it didn't have to do with fish (it was over something much dumber....the price of pumpkins). Some people get fuel from making your angry. The only way to make them stop is to continue talking to your friend and completely ignore the guy. 100% ignore him. I promise you this will tick him off beyond belief, and then he will lash out at you, and then he will leave. I've lurked enough deep corners of the internet to have this cycle down pat.
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Old 02-17-2013, 12:16 AM   #16622 
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Originally Posted by Hadoken Kitty View Post
Sparrow, that guy never had a course about fish. I can promise you that. I don't even have to know him to tell you that he's an imbecile. Just because he's gone to college, that does not make him a professional, nor does it make him automatically more intelligent. If he took a zoology class, they more than likely discussed a goldfish. With that being said, I can see where he would get his misinformation. However, if he had even an ounce of intelligence, he would know that these are two COMPLETELY different fish. Ignore him He is not worth your time. More than likely, he is trolling you. I had a friend's friend do this to me as well a while back, but it didn't have to do with fish (it was over something much dumber....the price of pumpkins). Some people get fuel from making your angry. The only way to make them stop is to continue talking to your friend and completely ignore the guy. 100% ignore him. I promise you this will tick him off beyond belief, and then he will lash out at you, and then he will leave. I've lurked enough deep corners of the internet to have this cycle down pat.
According to him, he studied bettas in a thing alongside his major in entomology, and has a family background in breeding bettas (in Malaysia). It wasn't worth pointing out that surviving is different to thriving, and we're talking about two very different climates. He actually claimed I was killing them by heating the water due to sped up metabolism. I can deal with morons, and just blow them off, but being called neglectful is something that really gets to me, because of the time and effort I put into caring for my dear little boys. I am an animal lover, and while I would not love all animals as pets, the pets I do have live in as much luxury as I can afford, sometimes more than I can afford. My partner perpetually complains that the fish get more attention than he does, so if that's being neglectful... I wonder what being a good pet owner entails.
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Old 02-17-2013, 12:21 AM   #16623 
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According to him, he studied bettas in a thing alongside his major in entomology, and has a family background in breeding bettas (in Malaysia). It wasn't worth pointing out that surviving is different to thriving, and we're talking about two very different climates. He actually claimed I was killing them by heating the water due to sped up metabolism. I can deal with morons, and just blow them off, but being called neglectful is something that really gets to me, because of the time and effort I put into caring for my dear little boys. I am an animal lover, and while I would not love all animals as pets, the pets I do have live in as much luxury as I can afford, sometimes more than I can afford. My partner perpetually complains that the fish get more attention than he does, so if that's being neglectful... I wonder what being a good pet owner entails.
I can see how having heat would speed up metabolism, if your outside/inside heat is a consistent (at the least) 82*F. However, over here, we do not have such luxuries for our bettas. Therefore heaters are necessary. You and I are similar in that my boyfriend complains of the same thing, because that's what loving pet owners do. We take care of our pets the best way we know how, and we do research to cover ourselves for what we don't know. Might I even point out that neglectful wouldn't even be the word to use in this situation? -.-
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Old 02-17-2013, 12:32 AM   #16624 
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I can see how having heat would speed up metabolism, if your outside/inside heat is a consistent (at the least) 82*F. However, over here, we do not have such luxuries for our bettas. Therefore heaters are necessary. You and I are similar in that my boyfriend complains of the same thing, because that's what loving pet owners do. We take care of our pets the best way we know how, and we do research to cover ourselves for what we don't know. Might I even point out that neglectful wouldn't even be the word to use in this situation? -.-
Neglectful definitely isn't the word to use for people who are doting owners. That is why I'm so angry. Furious/livid are probably better words to use. I admit when I trusted the pet shop, I was neglectful because I was dumb enough to trust them and not research, but since discovering this forum, I have spent at least 6 hours each day reading, asking questions, learning... And the rest of my time, I'm taking care of the boys.

This same guy had a go at me because I had to do water changes during a tabletop RPG we were playing over Skype. We had a completely full weekend after that day, and the days previous to it were taken up entirely by way too much housework, and so the water changes were necessary. I got a full-on lecture about how rude it was to take care of my pets during a game, and that they would've been fine for the weekend without a water change. NO. Two unfiltered 3.9 gal tanks and a 2 gallon tank would NOT be okay with no water changes for a week (what it would've been if I'd left it till after the busy weekend). I was ridiculed publicly for placing my bettas' wellbeing over a game campaign... That was previous to this latest outburst.

I'm honestly not sure why I've bothered to keep in contact with the guy, unless you find that the saying "Keep your friends close and your enemies closer" rings true. This guy is a loose cannon if you get on his bad side, and tends to sway people with his large vocabulary and passive-aggressive tendencies, and I tend to prefer NOT being in the firing line of such venom.
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Old 02-17-2013, 01:06 AM   #16625 
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Neglectful definitely isn't the word to use for people who are doting owners. That is why I'm so angry. Furious/livid are probably better words to use. I admit when I trusted the pet shop, I was neglectful because I was dumb enough to trust them and not research, but since discovering this forum, I have spent at least 6 hours each day reading, asking questions, learning... And the rest of my time, I'm taking care of the boys.

This same guy had a go at me because I had to do water changes during a tabletop RPG we were playing over Skype. We had a completely full weekend after that day, and the days previous to it were taken up entirely by way too much housework, and so the water changes were necessary. I got a full-on lecture about how rude it was to take care of my pets during a game, and that they would've been fine for the weekend without a water change. NO. Two unfiltered 3.9 gal tanks and a 2 gallon tank would NOT be okay with no water changes for a week (what it would've been if I'd left it till after the busy weekend). I was ridiculed publicly for placing my bettas' wellbeing over a game campaign... That was previous to this latest outburst.

I'm honestly not sure why I've bothered to keep in contact with the guy, unless you find that the saying "Keep your friends close and your enemies closer" rings true. This guy is a loose cannon if you get on his bad side, and tends to sway people with his large vocabulary and passive-aggressive tendencies, and I tend to prefer NOT being in the firing line of such venom.
How obnoxious. It's just a game, sheesh. Being an avid gamer (or was until college and the discovery of this site), I know that some people get far too into their game. You did fine. Like you said, he sounds like short fused, loose cannon. I'd just drop him and all of the drama that seems to encircle him. I have a word for people like that: Vortex of Doom.

Does your table-top game happen to me dungeons and dragons? :o
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Old 02-17-2013, 01:11 AM   #16626 
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How obnoxious. It's just a game, sheesh. Being an avid gamer (or was until college and the discovery of this site), I know that some people get far too into their game. You did fine. Like you said, he sounds like short fused, loose cannon. I'd just drop him and all of the drama that seems to encircle him. I have a word for people like that: Vortex of Doom.

Does your table-top game happen to me dungeons and dragons? :o
Vortex of Doom. I like that one! I may appropriate it for use in my life, my boyfriend will love it, hehe.

Nah, it was Pathfinder, but with the loss of that group of people I'll be looking into a different RPG probably. There are a ton to choose from, aren't there? I'm more of a board games and PC gamer usually though, and just getting into console, so tabletop RPGs are a whole new thing to me.
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Old 02-17-2013, 01:20 AM   #16627 
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Hehe. My social studies teacher used that on this girl when I was in the eighth grade. He would go into random outbursts occasionally. He finally realized that every time someone sat next to this girl, they would get in trouble. He went on this huge, arm flailing, rant about how she was like a vortex of doom, swallowing everyone around her and getting them all in trouble. It was pretty funny. :3

Aion is a really good game if you're looking for a free mmorpg (for PC) to pass some time until you find something more permanent. The graphics are really nice and they upgraded their system from when it was pay to play. Who knows, maybe it'll become your next permanent game. (:


Rant: I'm feeling paranoid now that two of the females I purchased are really male PKs >.<
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Old 02-17-2013, 08:58 AM   #16628 
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Why the heck aren't my curls on only one side of my hair holding??? And this is the side it used to hold on and the other side was the one that normally gave me issues...>.>

And this one shirt I am wearing keeps riding up...it is annoying!!
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Old 02-17-2013, 12:45 PM   #16629 
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I need some friendly encouragement. I am having some issues with low confidence and anxiety about having a job again. I don't know what to do. First off. my husband is no help because when I talk to him about having no confidence all he does is yells at me. He doesn't understand how I feel. I have so many thoughts running through my head it's breaking my heart.

1. What if going back to work causes me to get bad grades, I only have four weeks left to school.

2. I saw my old manager today which is the reason I quit this place to begin with. She laughed at me because I was not hired in as a manager like I was the first time. I chose not to be in management. But she made me feel an inch big and I had to smile at the woman and that about killed me.

3. I found out the new manager I have now is trying to transfer to another store already and I am upset. I am almost afraid that my bad luck will run out and my old manager that tortured me will come back.

4. I don't feel like I am doing anything right. I feel like I am a screw up and worth nothing.

5. My sister in law's baby is coming on the fifth and she is mad that Her husband isn't taking the day off and that my husband isn't taking the day off and I am not taking the day off. She doesn't seem to get that me and my husband can't because it isn't an emergency. She isn't being reasonable.


I don't know what to do to calm these fears and thoughts. It is killing me. I just wish I felt good about myself again because my confidence is so low my stuttering is coming back. It's making me look like an idiot at work with the customers. I don't know what to do. I can't talk to my husband about it because he doesn't get it. I can't talk to my mother about it because she will just tell me to quit and play the poor baby game with me. I have no friends, you guys are it. I am pathetic.
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Old 02-17-2013, 12:59 PM   #16630 
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Shirley:

First, you are not pathetic. A lot of us are introverts, and that's why we're able to be here for each other through this site (among getting knowledge of the wonderful world of betta keeping). Your husband yelling at you when you try to talk to him is extremely detrimental to the whole situation. Though I know how you feel, seeing as talking to anyone in my immediate family typically ends with the same response. You're right. Your sister in law is being ridiculous. It's understandable for her to be upset with HER husband, but to be upset at you guys is just ludicrous. The whole manager thing...well...she's just blowing smoke. Someone, ANYONE, who treats another person like that is surely lacking something in their life. Typically people will bash on others, because they're truly insecure themselves. By bashing on you, she is attempting to fill a gap in her life. She'll learn that this won't help eventually (hopefully), but until then she'll probably continue. I'm sure you can get a job. Just try finding a job somewhere else; anywhere else. Don't worry about the stutter. Just laugh it off and say you just can't talk today. I stutter when I'm feeling insecure as well.

If you're feeling especially depressed, psychology has shown that people who are in a depressed state typically cannot function normally. To the extent that their brain neurons literally do not fire at the rate of a "happy" person's. This would explain the stuttering. Nothing feels worse than having a thought and not being able to put it into words.

I really hope that things get better for you. Even more so, I hope that your husband can/will start listening more than talking/yelling. Maybe next time you can tell him that you just want someone to listen to, and not someone to give advice (BEFORE you start talking about what's getting you down).



Rant: When someone is complaining about you not doing something, but does it before you can and then continues to complain while they're doing it, and then complains more.
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