Shirley's Journal

[Shirleythebetta]

Wow, All Ike did here was blow some rough winds. Didn't even see any branches down. My mom is freaking out about this wind. She is afraid that the electric is going to go out but I don't think it will. The winds are rough but they don't seem as bad as all of that.

[dramaqueen]

The wind here is 20 miles an hour.

[Shirleythebetta]

That's pretty much what we have. It's supposed to get a little worse tomorrow but it isn't as bad as they sad. I live in a trailer so that is saying a lot for wind. If it isn't too bad for someone with three inch wide walls it isn't as bad as they said it would be here.

[Shirleythebetta]

Poor trick or treaters. I had to go to town late to pick up my meds and boy oh boy it was wet, cold, and rainy. The kids still went out in it for their goodies though. I have been having a rough week. I was trying to see what would happen without my meds and I have been crazy. I sobbed because our furnace wasn't working then I had some severe panic attacks. It feels so bad to be scared all the time and exhausting. I am so sick of it. I am to the point were I want to find a miracle drug that makes me feel nothing at all. I am sick of emotions. They stink.

[dramaqueen]

My cousin said Zoloft did that to her. Not me. lol

[Shirleythebetta]

I was on that before. Paxil killed my emotions pretty well though. My Psychiatrist won't give me an anti depressant until I get a sleep study. I may have apnea which causes depression too. I am stuck with lorazapam. I think the reason I freaked out this week is I was off of it for four days. I am calming a little now that I have it but I am still on edge. My dog just chased an animal under the house and I didn't realize it. Scared me to death. Everything makes me jumpy and I just want to be numb.

I love my shepard. He is such a good boy if I keep my terrier away. He lays right at my feet and follows me everywhere. My special boy :3 My terrier is a bad seed.

[Shirleythebetta]

Feeling pretty blah today. I got my nerve meds refilled and I am finally coming down from this nervous breakdown this week. I have a lot of headache and tiredness issues because of it though. I have worn myself out.

I had a so so day today. My birthday is tomorrow so my mother-in-law gave me my birthday card that told me she was sorry she didn't tell me enough how much she loved me :3 I then later had a panic attack and ended up crying at the bottom of my shower :(

The day before yesterday was interesting. I went to Jack's Aquarium to tie up the loose ends in my 20 gal high and bought a black and white Moon who is gawgeous, three zebra danio's and a sunset platy. I take them home and find out the sunset platy has dropsy so I take her all the way back and settle on a gold dust molly. My tank is full now but man I felt for that gal with the dropsy.

Oh and surprise surprise. I got another betta. Jeff named him Wolverine of course. He is a grizzle bodied Veiltail with Light brown fins and a bright purple color toward his body. I am a little concerned about him because he is trying so hard to swim to get air. I figure it's weak muscles because he looks healthy otherwise so I lowered the water to about five inches. Just enough to make him work out and he is moving a little more today. I think he just needs to excercise those fins.

[LebronTheBetta]

Don't be sad. My teeth got pulled out on Thursday because of my braces. The anesthesia shot hurt so much I cried! Happy Birthday, though! :) You got a new Betta, and things will get better, don't worry.

[Shirleythebetta]

Thanks Lebron,
I have a birthday party at my in-laws tomorrow. I may have to miss it because I now have a cold. My husband is getting mad at me because I am hot and won't lay down and rest. I can't help it, it's too boring laying down all the time. I do have my tablet back. When it carges a bit more I can get on there and play my games.

[LebronTheBetta]

No problemo, get well soon! Staying in bed is boring. :L