Betta Fish Care  
Go Back   Betta Fish and Betta Fish Care > Betta Chat
Check out the eBook Betta Fish Care Made Easy
betta fish
Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
Old 09-27-2012, 01:02 PM   #61 
crowntaillove
Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Virginia
i don't consider myself disabled but, I've also struggled with self-injury, but have successfully stopped for 4 years. My hips, wrists, ankles, legs, and breasts are still to this day an awful sight. :/ I've attempted sucide twice, so I guess you could say I have/had depression. I struggle with disordered eating. Before I had my daughter, I wouldn't eat. I went one month without eating (except 2 binges that ended up being purged with laxatives.) I had an ultrasound on my heart that determined I have something wrong with a valve, I think it has to do with overdosing on diet pills. I also have chest pain that comes and goes on an almost daily basis, but I'm too scared to go see a doctor.
crowntaillove is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-27-2012, 01:35 PM   #62 
Pilot00
Member
 
Pilot00's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Athens, Greece
Quote:
Originally Posted by crowntaillove View Post
I also have chest pain that comes and goes on an almost daily basis, but I'm too scared to go see a doctor.
Please do so at the earliest opportunity. I have left my influx without a doctor and medications for too long and it became a real pain. It will get only worse if you let untreated.
Pilot00 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-27-2012, 02:08 PM   #63 
lelei
Member
 
lelei's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Haverhill, MA
I am a cancer survivor..when I was 21 it was Ewings Sarcoma
lelei is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-27-2012, 04:00 PM   #64 
SpookyTooth
Member
 
SpookyTooth's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: England
(Long long long post!)

It is absolutely heart wrenching to know so many people are suffering but I wish you all the absolute best and most joy in life you can possibly be given; whether your frustrations are permanent, temporary, emotional or physical I am glad you have all found joy and comfort in bettas and whatever other passions you have in life, I wish you innumerable amounts of success.

I personally find the word "disability" a little restricting as when someone outside of your immediate circle hears that you are disabled it can be difficult for them to stray from the usual assumptions that surround the word. I find that no matter what illness, condition or "disability" a person has it often includes a great deal of frustration and that frustration can be what people are prejudiced against. Frustration can utterly destroy a person and make them "act out" or seem odd to others who quite bluntly just don't understand what it’s like to have your body or mind acting against you. I hope none of you mind me using the term frustration rather than disability, it's simply a personal preference. The vast majority of times I've had arguments amongst the family or with friends it's not due to my actual illness but the frustration that it encompasses.

I've had Myalgic Encephalopathy (ME) for the last eight years. ME (also known as chronic fatigue syndrome but I don't like that name) is believed to be a neurological disorder where the immune system is triggered and simply doesn't slow down, it's on the attack all the time and therefore causes constant exhaustion, muscle and joint pain & fatigue, headaches, stomach aches, sleeping for hours but simply not feeling refreshed, plenty of cognitive frustrations (short-term memory loss, mood swings, concentration issues, "brain fog"), hypersensitive senses (sight, sound, taste, touch, smell; I can't wash some days due to water hurting my skin) and just a seemingly endless list of your typical ailments one encounters when sick. The worst part is it’s all invisible, no one can see you’ve been sick… they just see someone underweight, pale and with dark circles under their eyes.

I have bad days and I have worse days. No two days are the same -- heck, on my worst days sometimes no two hours are the same.

I’ve had mental help from two different sources, once forced upon me when I was attempting to attend school on a regular basis; the other was an optional choice in an attempt to not let my previous experience slow my progress. I’ve since stopped seeing my last therapist as I started back-tracking in the exact same fashion as I did previously. I know that the modified cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) I was given can work for some people with ME but for me it simply hasn’t done anything except worsen my already non-existent self-esteem and pushed my farther from my goals; that’s the problem with this thing… no one knows exactly what causes it so people can only string together theories and care routines from other conditions showing similar symptoms.

The only bit of advice I could ever give to another person with ME is to try to learn to live with it, don’t fight against it. When you fight it, it fights back ten times harder. Learn your triggers, discover what relaxes you and encourages you and try to find compromises that enable you to move forward whilst not pushing yourself so hard so fast that you end up bed-ridden 20hours a day like I was.

To everyone else: it may sound rather typical but try to focus on what you can do, not what you can't. Do what you love to do and love what you're able to do, you'll find this forms a cycle and that cycle will grow and will consume so much positive energy that surrounds your successes -- trust me, there will be plenty once you get that circle rolling. Of course there'll also be failures but if you keep your eyes ahead and remind yourself that the smallest, tiniest positive change you can make will have such a big impact later down the line. Why? Because you tried.

I realized and accepted this not that long ago… I’m now able to do the dishes on a daily basis, bake some basic recipes like banana bread and cupcakes and I have a meeting on Monday to enquire about volunteering opportunities at our local church -- something I never thought would happen. I’ve had so many failures, so many more than my miniscule number of successes and I’ve let so many people down but when I hit the bottom of the pit I decided I was too freaking stubborn to let this debilitating piece of expletive excrement win, I learned the hard way multiple times that I just have to accept this and live with it... at least for now. One day I'm sure I'll get to a stage where I can start to push beyond it but right now I have goals to reach and minor (but significant) things to achieve!

I'm sure the same can be said for many of you who are struggling with your own frustrations. It's hard to look to tomorrow... so don't! Focus on today and on those moments where you actually feel okay, even if it's just okay. You don't have to feel great all the time or smile all the time, you don't have to force yourself into situations you know will harm you or test you far too much.
SpookyTooth is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-27-2012, 04:35 PM   #65 
ChoclateBetta
Banned
 
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Virginia
I am excepting my problems. I take so many pills it hurts my stomach. All my pills are vitomens. I have the genes and symptoms of mthfr. 5 from one parent 4 from another. So I think the genes for a condition and the symptoms are enough. I have all vitomens decencies. I am pretty sure one of my legs is longer than the other.
ChoclateBetta is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-27-2012, 06:10 PM   #66 
LionCalie
Member
 
LionCalie's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: California, USA
Wonderful post, SpookyTooth. I found it very inspiring.

I try not to sit around the house feeling sorry for myself and wondering why I couldn't have a "normal" life. Most people my age finished college and have a career job now. I never finished high school. Everyday is a struggle for me... but I still try to do what I can. While my mom works full-time, I do my best to keep the house clean. I view that as my job. Also, I volunteer with animal rescues when I can because it gives me a feeling of purpose.
LionCalie is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-27-2012, 07:12 PM   #67 
ChoclateBetta
Banned
 
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Virginia
We all do the best we can.
ChoclateBetta is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-27-2012, 10:37 PM   #68 
crowntaillove
Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Virginia
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pilot00 View Post
Please do so at the earliest opportunity. I have left my influx without a doctor and medications for too long and it became a real pain. It will get only worse if you let untreated.
I know I should. I was uninsured until a couple months ago, but still I have a 1500 deductable. If I did find out there was something wrong with me, I'd be really depressed and I wouldn't want my family to find out and worry. :/ Hopefully it'll just go away.

Also, I wish I could "like" your post Spooky. :]
crowntaillove is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-28-2012, 03:05 AM   #69 
Pilot00
Member
 
Pilot00's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Athens, Greece
Quote:
Originally Posted by LionCalie View Post
Wonderful post, SpookyTooth. I found it very inspiring.

I try not to sit around the house feeling sorry for myself and wondering why I couldn't have a "normal" life. Most people my age finished college and have a career job now. I never finished high school. Everyday is a struggle for me... but I still try to do what I can. While my mom works full-time, I do my best to keep the house clean. I view that as my job. Also, I volunteer with animal rescues when I can because it gives me a feeling of purpose.
I am at the same standstill now. I have just finished my studies (took way longer that it should though) in Uni and i cant find a job anywhere. My friends all work somewhere and have good jobs. One is a civil servant, one does his Phd and the other is a computer programmer. I moved to another country in the hopes of finding something and i am failing even at that.
I am thinking of returning to my house and resigning to house duty. It would seem odd to see a man do such things but what else can I do? My only concearn is that there will be no salary and thus no money...
Pilot00 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-28-2012, 04:48 AM   #70 
ChoclateBetta
Banned
 
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Virginia
My concern is the pills.
ChoclateBetta is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Fish keepers from Idaho? PhilipPhish Betta Chat 5 06-08-2012 12:15 PM
Disabled Betta KappaTheImp Betta Chat 7 05-20-2012 02:30 PM
very disabled betta fish Luimeril Betta Fish Care 31 02-15-2011 05:02 PM


All times are GMT -5. The time now is 01:08 PM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.7.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.