Don't know if you're still listening to rants, but here's mine!
My in-laws. Seriously, I don't get these people. My husband and I come form 2 different cultures, and a good part of his family didn't approve of his marriage to me. As a result, we very calmly, very responsibly said, "Well, we're all adults here. If you can't respect our relationship, then that's your choice, but don't expect us to invite you over or to make a huge effort to make you a part of our lives together. When you can respect our life together as man and wife, then we'll talk. We don't hate you, but we can't have people treating our marriage as a catastrophy and one person in particular (i.e. me) as the single worst disater in the history of humankind. So either get over it, or kindly refrain from involving yourself in our lives. The choice is yours."
Sounds reasonable, right? I mean, we've been trying for YEARS to get these people to just adapt, even show some tolerance, but ya know what? I'm still that evil foreign vixen that seduced their little boy / nephew / son / brother. As far as I know, they haven't accused me of "stealing" their jobs, but even after all these years, all they know about me is that A) I speak a foreign language (even though I don't speak it in front of them and communicate with them in THEIR language), and B) I have hair (his sister, whenever she remembers me at Christmas, always buys me hair conditioner as a gift. I'm not kidding. Year after year, I either get nothing - not even a glance in my direction or an attempt at conversation - otherwise I get some lame bottle of hair conditioner on the rare occasion she remembers. This has been going on since we started dating).
So, back to my rant. I'm planning a birthday party for my husband. A big affair, with a meal and a rented hall for dancing and all that, and of course we invited those few members of his family that have either A) shown some degree of tolerance towards our relationship, or B) are so close in terms of kinship ties that not inviting them would have probably resulted in getting the brakelines on my car cut. (You all think I'm kidding, but these people are NUTS!)
So .... what does my mother-in-law do? She INVITES ALL THE FAMILY AND DOESN'T TELL ME! So today I get a call with her RSVP (list!), and I'm like ... W. T. H. Who gave her the okay to invite all these people? I mean, we're paying for the food and drink, and she just takes it upon herself to invite people who haven't spoken to us in YEARS (since our wedding), but think they can just ease their way back into our lives for free food and booze. ON MY DIME NO LESS!! So, I called my husband at work and told him the latest, and he made it very clear that these people, family or not, weren't not welcome. At least not until they get their act together and start showing a little respect for our relationship. He called up his mother and explained it to her, and what does she do? She starts her typical crying jag. Seriously, everytime she doesn't get her way, the waterworks and the hysterical sobbing starts. It's unreal. She kept saying over and over again that she wanted "the family" to "be together". I was tempted to ask her, " ... and the fact that it's not together is the result of our marriage? You mean, all the adultry and divorces and wife swapping and drug and alcohol abuse and criminal behavior and assault that's been going on for generations was somehow HELPFUL in keeping the family whole and functional? SERIOUSLY? *I* am the single factor that tore this well-functionning, stable, loving unit apart? Are you kidding me?" Who'da thunkit?
Anyway, now I have to deal with the un-invitations, since my mother-in-law is too busy crying hysterically and getting drunk to deal with it. I figure I'll do it, since they all hate me anyway. I've got nothing to lose!
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