Originally Posted by bahamut285
To be totally honest, it's not really fair to ask "ALL MEN" to be understanding of women when women themselves also do not understand men. Men and Women speak different "languages". There is a really good book entitled: "Women are from Venus, Men are from Mars", which teaches the communication types in men and women.
Women take very small cues in the verbal language of their respective men. However men don't even speak like that, so the effort is always misconstrued as something else.
For example the following conversation:
Woman: What do you want to do tonight?
Man: we can do whatever
The woman immediately thinks stuff along the lines of: "Why is he not making a suggestion? I always make the suggestions. Maybe he doesn't even care enough about me to make a suggestion. How come he doesn't know what activities I like?"
The man actually means: "I just want her to be the happiest doing an activity she desires the most so I will let her pick"
Woman then gets upset at man, then man has no idea what he said wrong, then woman accuses him of being inattentive, guy is still confused, woman snowballs into rage.
It is neither fair for the guy nor the girl to be confused or angry respectively
I also don't bring up older post but it ties in with my actual rant and it's "old" by all of 5 days. I think the necrobump police will just let me off with a warning.
Books like that drive me insane. Not only do they treat men and women like cookie cut outs but they ignore the existance of transgender men and women. Also, I am a blunt and literal person. When I ask, "Where do you want to eat" and the guy says, "where ever you want to eat," I pick a place to eat because I simply want dinner. I'm not testing how much he loves me by giving me my way or how much he wants to control me by making me eat somewhere. I just want food at a location that is mutually satisfying to all the poeple who will be eating a meal with me.
Also...I'm not asking every man on the planet to understand all the women on the planet. I'm asking 1 man to understand that he needs to throw books like "Women are from Venus, Men are from Mars"
into a bon fire because it will not help him understand me or any woman who isn't an insecure mind game made flesh.
I think it is very fair for me to be upset if a guy who won't get to know and understand me as an individual because he "can't understand women". I don't need a man who understands women. I need a man who understand me as a unique individual who just happens to be a woman.
My Independant Rant - Online Dating
I feel like I'm wasting my time on dating websites because it is so assumption based. I do not look like a 27 year old organic chemist with a BA and MA in Chemistry who is learning Japanese language and enjoys playing video games. The responses I get on sites leads me to one conclusion, most men think I'm lying. Since I don't look the part of a scientist, men don't want to deal with my "lies" even when I message them first.
Grant it...some of them may be afraid of being tricked into a relationship with someone who may not be 18 or up. But what 16-17 year old pretends to be a 27 year old chemist? Is it a current fade I'm missing? I'm still waiting for my appearance to be a blessing. Because looking 10 years younger naturally at the age of 27 makes something as simple as flirting and dating impossible. And when I can get past the first date, it usually crashes and burns (especially if I realize the guy was interested because he thought I was 10 years younger).
If eHarmony doesn't work out I'm just going to give up and prepare to live my life as a crazy fish lady in an aquarium house.