I understand some limits to discipline... Punishment VS discipline. I'd like to do some military versions of discipline (push ups, holding arms horizontally while holding a weight in each hand, chores etc) but apparently that "injures their fragile minds". Well if a kid cries they had to WORK then heck ill destroy THAT mind -.-
I'm on the fence when it comes to physically disciplining kids.
On the one hand, a spanking or hand smack or whatever could work is because children can't be reasoned with. By that I mean a 8 year old wants a toy and wouldn't put it back on the self because he wants the toy. He doesn't want the toy because he can see how having that toy will enrich his life by teaching him valuable skills. He just wants the toy. You can tell him that he has enough toys at home to play with, but he will still want the toy. You can tell him that you will keep in mind he really wants that toy and will get it for him for his birthday or Christmas, but he'll want the toy now. You can even explain that he may want something but that doesn't mean he can have it until he earns it, but he will still continue to beg. At that point you can't reason with illogical desires but a light swat to the head will get the toy back on the self.
On the other hand, physical punishment is damaging when it is used as a last resort or waaaaaaay to often. My Grandma hit me for being "bad" from age 6 to 8 because she just couldn't think of any other way to make me act right. Time outs, multiple explanations, and every other child training method on the planet just wasn't stopping me from behaving "badly". The reason why I have "bad" and "badly" in qoutes is because the beatings stopped at age 8 when I was diagnosed with ADHD and medication curbed the "bad" behaviors. In short, I was beat daily with a belt for 2 years because of the myth that ADHD isn't real and children are simply good or bad. The difference between me off my meds and me on my meds was enough to convince my Grandma that ADHD was real and I had it.
I can see the logic behind physical punishment because a quick smack can bring an illogical kid back down to earth. But I also see the damage behind physical punishment because I can't wear a belt to this day and I'm 27. It depends on the kid in the end.
I also feel the same way about yelling...but that's a different rant. XD
My rant of the day: My friend, had to quit college in the USA because of people being tards about religion. So what? He's muslim. So what? He is not american. YOU (those jerks) are NOT the only living beings on this earth. Some people need to be brought down off their high horse, and be taught the right way. It actually hurts ME... To hear about this. Another reason I dislike people... Most can never learn.
Last edited by Sena Hansler; 01-16-2013 at 03:19 PM.
I was at a lighting store and I saw an old friend of my grandparent's, she asked me what I was up to, and I said I am totally obsessed with fish. she said: "but fish are boring, why do you like them?"
I said: "they have personalities, they will come and swim up against the glass when you walk into the room"
her: "they're just hungry, they're not smart. for a pet to be good, it has to have fur"
I think my grandparents knew I was about to explode, they got me out of there fast.
I don't "reason" with children. In my experience, reasoning with children caused children taking advantage of their parents. Which is not a good thing. Children tend to learn best by cause and affect. If I do this, I'll get smacked. And I don't like getting smacked. So I don't think I'll do this. Very simple. Heck my own dogs have learned from this!
With my niece, the "we won't get mad" routine is stupid to use. Because duh, you ARE mad and she KNOWS it. 100% chance you will be mad, 50% chance she can get away with whatever it is... So if she lies, she has a 50% chance. Tells the truth, you are mad anyways. I know this since I was just like her I plainly told her, she needed to tell me what happened so nothing bad happens and she understood.
If I ever have children (and I never will so oh well :P), I would not spank my children, there is just no need for that. Children are smarter than adults think IMO and CAN reason and see/understand things and consequences of actions. You just have to go about it in a different way than you would with an adult. I think adults often forget they were children once too.
Anyhooo, my own rant is: I memorized all my favorite channel numbers and where they were located on the tv guide and now I gotta learn all the new channels on this new cable network since we just changed it. Yeesh...:P
She is impossibly crazy. I really truly believe she has multiple personality disorder. She HAS had a lot of bad things happen to her but so has everyone. She is having a complete meltdown. Refusing to pay my home taxes that she used to pay for every year. Which is fine because they are my problem but it was a quick "I am not paying them" with no kindness at all.
She has been drinking more which I despise because she judges others for thier habits and addictions and then gets mad when other people do it. She says things about her siblings who drink but it's okay for her?
She treats me like I am from some kind of beautiful and rich home and doesn't talk to me much because of it. All because I said that Olive Garden is not a fine dining resteraunt and my parents own a 2004 f-150 and a 2013 mustang GT. News flash, they mad payments to get the truck and are in debt up to their eyeballs on the mustang. Nice cars don't mean you are rich.
Oh and I forgot I am weird because I don't want to live in a trailer. She even asked my husband if we were going to get a house close to my parents because I want a nice new home. What is so wrong with not wanting to live in a breezy trailer with wheels that is not anchored to the ground and under a group of trees. I don't find anything wrong with wanting to do better with your life.
I can't believe her with her grandbaby on the way too. She pushed my sis in law into getting pregnant and now that she is 8 weeks until due, she is now telling her she isn't babysitting so she better find alternatives. My sis in law is getting desperate to move out because of her moms drinking and her step dads perpetually sick son. She is getting terrified the baby is going to catch something from him.
She is pregnant and been on antibiotics twice because this kid is always sick with something. I told her she needs to get out of that house quick. I hope we can move soon so she can move in this place at least. My husband said he doesn't care what the heck she pays as long as she pays something each month just to get her out of her moms way.
This woman I swear, she claims to be a good christian woman but drinks and has sold her perscriptions for money, she wanted this grandchild so now she is going through a midlife crisis. She is up and down high and low all the time. I can't keep up. One day I am her best friend and the next day I am an evil rich witch and how dare I talk to her. The best complaint yet, she complains about not having any money and where is she now? drinking... at the bar... this good christian woman who does everything for everyone with no help from anyone. No, nobody helps her at all. My husband doesn't go over there and check her fluids in her car and help fix them NOOOOOO.... her daughter doesn't take care of her schizophrenic brother that SHE gets paid to take care of because she is too busy drinking.
I can't friggin stand her and I swear if she ever needs a place to live she is living in my garage or in a carboard box or I will be moving out because I will never live under the same roof as her EVER.
Last edited by Shirleythebetta; 01-16-2013 at 05:01 PM.