Fenghuang- I too suffer from extreme anxiety/depression, to the point of being apathetic and flat out miserable for a few days, and sometimes it is like a switch turns on and I am happy again. But sometimes it might take me a long time to come out of that really sad or depressed state too. Often times, I can get upset or depressed it seems almost at the drop of a hat. My hormones definitely contribute to how my issues present themselves. Maybe not in the exact same way, but I definitely understand how you can be feeling. If you are concerned about bipolar, maybe it IS a good thing to see a psychiatrist. It doesn't make you a weaker person, regardless of what others might think, and you can get tested for certain disorders and/or treated if it affects you too much in life. :)
If you need anyone to talk to, I too am available to talk. I love having people to talk to who know what I go through, because it makes me feel better, that I am not alone with my own struggles.
I hope you feel better soon!
My rant- I too have been going through an extreme low with my depression, and though I kinda am okay now, I am still dwelling on some things that have gone on recently. I just am confused and I am so close to throwing my hands in the air and giving up on everything.
It's okay to be anti-education. I have a bit of an obsession with education even when I'm not in classes. I.E.- I'm about to start reading Charles Darwin's The Origin of Species. It's probably unhealthy, really... :/
I guess this was the only point I was trying to get across:
That is NOT to be confused with schizophrenic grandeur, though! It is very often that schizophrenia can be accompanied with other mental illnesses, but not the other way around. I can even see why someone would blame schiz grandeur for a manic episode in a schiz bipolar patient.
However, to say that a bipolar person (suffering from this mental illness alone) would do this is just wrong.
Like I said previously, I was wrong to be all "I'm right and you're wrong".... I really am not one to do this very often at all. However, I knew that misinformation was being put out there and multiple google searches was not bringing up the correct DSM-IV classification (my psych teacher had it and that's what we used when talking about mental disorder classifications). I understand that the DSM needs to be updated, as they still call quite a few mental disorders different names than they are now, but the names are really all that have changed.
I can see someone in a manic state (suffering from bipolar alone) going: "I feel unstoppable! I FEEL LIKE JESUS!!!", but they won't go "Hello, I am Jesus. It's nice to meet you," and seriously believe that they are Jesus. A Schizophrenic patient would do this. You really have to include the other mental illness or you're not understanding how mental illnesses work.
Rant: I really don't want to go to school today. My mom called me this morning about her and her boyfriend arguing...again....it was a wonderful way to start the morning (sarcasm).
Sometimes I feel like throwing in the towel, too. Life sucks.
It's so hard when things seem to keep going wrong when you try so hard to make things right and be a good person despite all the crap always thrown your way. :( I am so stubborn I keep forging forward despite all this, but that doesn't mean I am not miserable while doing it. :/
I was through life with an undiagnosed social anxiety disorder. When I became unable to function, I started trying to find a doctor who could help me. I saw so many jokers- some PhDs, social workers, etc. but they didn't understand my disorder; I had to educate each one. No one person's disorder is "textbook". I eventually found a psycopharmacologist (sp?) who balanced out medications so that I could go through life with no anxiety plus no "doped up" feeling. He saved my life. The biggest drawback is that, once I had my life back, no-one knew who I was! I was always too shy to speak up or participate in sports, and suddenly I was running around going out, learning to swim, ski, etc!!! I was embarassed to tell everyone that the "old me" was a "diseased me" & I could function again due to DRUGS: ooohhhh, how horrible!!!! Don't tell anyone that!!!
Now the downside is that my Dr. of 12 years retired. He left me with a list of his colleagues, and I've been going through them- each one is worse than the last. My GP is threatening to "cut off my meds": she agreed to continue writing scripts for me until I found a new psychiatrist, but now my insurance won't cover one. WHY IS LIFE SO HARD????
My opinion is that NO ONE knows you like you do, and no one can help you unless they are willing to sit down and listen, then give their opinion. You may have to go through a bunch of well-educated morons. And, even though one Dr. may be a moron for your issues, maybe they have some talent with some other speciality (dog traing? ;0) )
We can't diagnose any disorder here on a board. All we can do is support one another. One thing I HAVE learned: If you think you're crazy, or bipolar, you aren't. Truley sick people will deny, deny, deny- then blame it on everyone else: they are the crazy ones.
That being said, I have "diagnosed" (through observation) that the younger of my 2 half-bros has a deep detachment disorder. He has scary mood swings. He has ripped into all of us supportive family members savagely, and made scenes during holiday get-togethers. I would NEVER tell him he needs help b/c I'm afraid he'd kill me. P. S. We're all very much adults; I'm 52, my brother is 62 & my other 1/2 bro is 65. My oldest 1/2 bro is the most wonderful person in the world, and it's b/c he's had extensive counseling. We three had an abusive father and an absent (emotionally) mother, and this is the damage it's caused. My Dad passed away 3 years ago, and it's been healing for us all: not the least b/c we are now free of our truely insane step-mother.
Wow, sorry- I haven't had anyone to talk to for a long time.
I don't mean any offense--just nitpicking--but I disagree with the "If you think you're crazy, or bipolar, you aren't. Truly sick people will deny, deny, deny." A mental disorder does not necessarily mean "crazy." There is a broad spectrum of different kinds of disorders and how they manifest themselves. Crazy isn't even a real scientific or medical term. Craziness is an informal way of saying insanity. Today, insanity is only used in the legal context to denote if whether a person can be held accountable to their actions or not in the eyes of the law. For an example, if you led a perfectly normal life and suddenly started displaying schizophrenics symptoms (because normally, the onset of schizophrenia is during late adolescence and early adulthood), you can realize something is wrong. Not everyone has full blown psychosis where they can't differentiate their illness from reality.
I know "crazy" isn't a diagnosis, but when I was at rock bottom, I kept saying to myself "I'm crazy and I'm going to be locked up", "people think I'm crazy" etc. over and over in my head. My problem was anxiety. If I was really detached from reality, those thoughts would never have occurred to me. I'm defining "crazy" as a pathological behaviour that the person in question does not acknowledge; I give my brother as an example. He think's he's just fine, when in reality, he is not.