I came to rant and instead I've found kindred spirits :o
i didn't expect to find so many similar people in one place (:
but yeah, everyone has their own problems, and you really don't know unless you've been in their shoes.
the betta are definitely therapeutic.. something about water. and the same ritual of feed and then water changes every morning is nice. watching them, playing with them and caring for them.. i'm not certain why i haven't gotten into caring for bettas earlier. (:
Originally Posted by dramaqueen
It's amazing how some people think it's all a bunch of baloney, that you're lazy, don't want to take responsibility for stuff, etc.
this is definitely true. a lot of people are really quick to judge and it's hard to explain to them that you really can't help it, that if you could, you would, and you're doing everything in the book to try to.
DQ, our moms definitely sound alike..
since we're passing the hugs around :3 -hugs everybody-
That's terrible DQ... I don't think my parents ever understood what was wrong and why it was wrong but they knew there was something and luckily they were pretty patient. The only thing was no drugs.. That was their only issue. Whatever had to be done, would be done through counselling. My psychologist was my psychology professor that was awkward for a while :/ ..
And the stigma thing that fishcurl said is so true.. I had some good friends then, who've stuck with me but some people were just buffoons especially classmates. :( I still haven't told any of my college friends about my problems but I told my bf and he was pretty supportive, turns out his mum was a depressive so he understood. I was so relieved at that moment!
Its hardest to tell people you're close to because how they judge you will hurt you most... I still have some "mood swings" now and then but very rarely....
:/ None of my friends ever understood either. Some were more patient with me than others but ultimately, no one really understood the anxiety and fear part. They couldn't understand what I was so afraid of and I couldn't really tell them because I barely knew myself. I just knew that some things made me really anxious.
I missed my best friend's wedding three years ago. She was having it in a location that was several hours drive and back then, I just couldn't go for long distances; I've gotten better now. I was sad that I couldn't be in it but when she said she was having it far away, I was really sad because I couldn't even go. I thought she understood why but the day before the wedding she stopped talking to me. She sends cards to my folks every now and then but not to me. Weird, huh.
Fighter, I'm so glad your bf understands. That's probably my biggest fear about trying to get a boyfriend: will he understand? Oh, that and just the general idea of dating, haha.
That is weird. :( I think she should have been more open minded. Along my way, I learned which friends to keep and which not to. I think when I was in school I had a huge group of friends but now I have maybe 3 really close friends... The rest are people who I hang out with "for fun". They don't know much about me and I don't bother telling them.. Out of those 3 best friends, one has stuck with me through everything and I stuck with her through all her problems, her fiance left her and married someone else, all in a span of a week X(. We have a really good bond, even though we live in 2 opposite ends of the country now..
I totally know what you mean by barely knowing yourself.. I would feel like I'm in the pits of despair but never knew why.. When someone asked what happened, I'd say I don't know.. I actually can't blame them for thinking I was weird. I mean that is a weird answer isn't it.. :/
I wasn't even looking for a relationship when I met my bf, I was terrified of it! In fact, I'm still terrified of the fact that if he leaves me I wont find anyone else :/.. We were friends for 2 years before we started going out. We actually understood each other a lot even before we started dating. If I ever get into a mood he's always getting me ice cream or cake lol! Initially, he didn't know what to do but he'd still insist on helping, I just told him, it'll go away on its own.. Now he knows better but I don't mind the sweets. :)
I think that is the best way to get into a relationship, to start out as friends. :) I just need to meet some guy friends. There was the guy who sold me my Mac but I never got up the nerve to talk to him except about computers . . . haha. I'd better start hanging out in fish stores now, maybe meet someone in the betta row.
Yeah, I can totally understand why my friends were confused and even frustrated with me, and why my parents would sometimes be frustrated too. They've been awesome throughout this whole thing even when I said some really hateful things to them. I owe them a lot, not just for adopting me but for taking such good care fo me, too. That's why even though I get frustrated living at home, I deal with it because my mom needs my help now that her health isn't so great.
That really stinks about your friend and what happened to her with her fiance. I'm glad she had a good friend to help her through it, what a hard time that must have been.
Yes, hang out at the fish stores! Snag a betta lover :D!
Even though it may be true that you owe them a lot, its really good of you to live with them and help out your mom, there are so many people who forget the good things others have done for them. You're doing the right thing Sakura! You're a good person. :)
She had a really rough time but she's doing better without him IMO. He was a real loser X(
I drfinitely understand the anxiety and fear. I just kept thinking anout stuff over and over. What if this happens, what if that happens. I felt like I was going crazy. I couldn't eat and I wasn't sleeping well. Being a psychology major, I knew I had a problem. I also talked to a neighbor who is a psychologist and she advised me to see my doctor.
I was really lucky with Kevin, honestly. He sent me a text when I was going through a really bad night and noticed something was up... He stayed up with me all night talking me through it, and then did it again about a week later. Since then he's always been there with me when I start getting depressed, just being a very helpful shoulder to lean on. It's made it so that we had a very strong relationship even as friends, and so much more so now that we're dating. He's the only person who knows about my depression because I'm too scared to tell anyone else. Everyone thinks of depression as the cutting yourself suicidal kind, and it's so hard to realize my friends would think of me like that...