I was told by my vet that rat neuters/small animal neuters are pretty common and easy; neuters in general are like 5 minute procedures, it's just the anaesthesia part that takes time. Spaying a small animal, however, is much rarer and much more involved.
In some cases, people have had these rats/small animals that peacefully coexisted and then suddenly turned on each other and the only way to keep all of them was to neuter them. So, neutering a hamster if necessary isn't nearly as traumatic as it sounds. Laki's right, it's probably just finding the right veterinarian to do it.