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Old 07-15-2011, 12:33 AM   #1 
HD4life
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A betta life

Chapter One

My egg shell is thining now, I can see my fathers dark figure moving too and fro beneth me. How many siblings will I have? I ask myself. I wonder how well my father will care for us, if he will help me learn to swim or if he will be too busy to give us each attenion. I suppose I cant really blame him If my mother blessed him with hundreds of us eggs. Im counting the hours to when I will see my father, I bet he is strong and majestic. "Father!" I cry out. "yes?" a muffled reply. "When will I see you?" "You dont have long now, a few of your brothers and sisters have hatched already". Oh how I wished I could have hatched first, I dont want to be an egg, I want to be a fry. I suddenly feel a current, I must be falling! "Ahh!" here is the test, will my father catch me? Will he care that Im in danger? Bump bump.... I hit bottom.. The seconds are ticking away for what seems like an eternity for my tiny being. A soft draft comes over my shell, a warm voice says "I got you". I can feel the quick suction of being picked up and swam to the surface. To my relief father has brought me back to safety along with a few of my siblings. "weee" I hear them cry as we are blown into the nest. Fun? Are they serious? I have never been so scared! "Brother.. you know, you get used to it.. thats the 6th time today for me" One of my sisters said as if she could read my mind. "I really wasn't that scared" I say in denial. In the safety of our nest we wait... I can wiggle a little now, I feel freedom getting closer. Sudden darkness.. "Ok kids get some rest, our caregiver has turned out the lights." Caregiver? What is a caregiver? Something I suppose I will see soon when I'm strong enough to get out of here..
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Old 07-15-2011, 07:44 AM   #2 
mernincrazy8525
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Wow, keep writing. that was really good!!
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Old 07-15-2011, 12:05 PM   #3 
HD4life
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Thanks :) Ive been trying to do some illustrations for my little story too but its not working lol

Chapter Two

I wake suddenly to a quick rythmic thumping and vibrating in the nest. Many of my siblings are yelling out in fear. "Its ok children, That is the human fry running near our waters." Father says. A human fry? It must be huge to shake our waters like that. "Father what is a human?" I ask him. "Our dear caretaker is a human son. The young human fry does not seem to notice we are here though and occationally causes trouble, it is the adult who cares for us, you will see her soon." He says in a reassuring voice. With his comment of seeing, I realize now with the sleep scared from my eyes, that my shell is clear. Something inside me says I should escape. I try to stretch out.. my shell bends with my movements.. encouraging me to push harder. I'm so excited, I can taste freedom. I wiggle and squirm with more force, stretch again and again to set myself loose. "Arrgh! This is harder than I thought!" Father chuckles, "Save your energy son, you have a lot of work ahead of you once you hatch." I pretend I didn't hear and continue squirming more vigorous than before. I heave a sigh with my last, strongest stretch "hrmmmmmm" POP! "hehehee" I exclaim proudly yet exhausted.... sinking to the bottom. "Awesome" "You did it" "Welcome to the water" some of my siblings cry out. I respond with a little nod for that is all I have energy for. "Welcome to your new home son" Father tells me as he smiles. I smile back and raise a fin, panting. I am suprised at my fathers mix of strength and beauty. His deep blue color and the length of his fins, how they reipple and trail wo elegantly behind him as he rushes to the surface and back. "I will let you rest before I make you hang by yourself." He says as he swims to pick up my other siblings around me.
My freedom has become bitter sweet. I'm gald I am not confined and cramped like in my shell but now I am helpless and sink with any hault in effort to keep in the nest. It gets rather tiring but I have learned that my father always comes through for me. Some of my siblings are swimming now, I'm jealous, I don't want to be stuck down here while they are starting to enjoy themselves and explore the water. As I lay here, I ask myself lifes questions and wonder where this "caretaker" is. I have not seen her yet today. "Father?" He slowly swims down to me "yes my boy?" "Will you tell me about my mother?" I ask him. I have wondered about her, what she looked like and if I will resemble her when I get older. "Well son, your mother was beautiful, a deep purple, and perfect fins. She stayed with me for a few days until she gifted me with all of you eggs, she even helped me build my nest and care for you. Your mother was a fine female and I believe I see her curiosity in you." He said with a smile as he strocked my head with a fin. I could tell he admired her, and for him to say I had a quality of her's meant a lot to me. "Alright kiddo, lets get back in the nest" He said as he swooped me up and brought me to the surface.
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Old 07-15-2011, 12:31 PM   #4 
NCPanthersgurl
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Ooo I love this. It drew me right in and your details, though few, are plenty for what you needed to convey. Keep writing! :)
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Old 07-15-2011, 12:57 PM   #5 
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Shimi's Stamp of Approval (SSA)
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Old 07-15-2011, 01:33 PM   #6 
HD4life
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Lol thanks guys :) I get into creative moments, But it never seems to stick around.
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Old 07-15-2011, 03:15 PM   #7 
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wow thats good
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Old 07-15-2011, 03:15 PM   #8 
HD4life
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I rest my eyes as I lay on the floor of our tank, I'm exhausted from swimming, I've been doing well compared to the spiraling out of control my first day as a fry. My sisters still tease me about being younger and not the best swimmer, but My father says I will learn and if Im strong I will be a great swimmer and the caretaker will keep me and I too will be a father someday. I remember his story of being taken, shipped and forgotten in a warehouse full of sick and deseased fish when he was just a juvie, how scared he was and so unsure of his fate. He was sold to a smaller fish store were he was cared for poorly and mistreated by the other fish. He says we wont have to deal with that here and one day most of us will find our own caretakers. It's un nerving to think of possibly being alone all my adult live, but I'm greatful it is rather far away at this point. Thump thump thump..... "FOOD!" my sister shrieks as the caretaker taps the corner of our tank and swirled a portion of food in the water for us. "Aww yes!" a brother exclamed. This time it was my favorite, the little pinkish things that jerk through the water. As I eat my fill I watch the others gobbling up anything that moves in front of them, laughing and smiling all the while. I cant help but hope the caretaker will always be here and we can enjoy ourselves like this for a long time.
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Old 07-15-2011, 03:21 PM   #9 
TheBlueBettaFish
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In my opinion its way too choppy. Try to make it flow a little better. Other than that, it was pretty good. :-/
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Old 07-15-2011, 03:36 PM   #10 
HD4life
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Come on seriously? That comment was not said to be rude. Is there no such thing as given the benefit of the doubt anymore.
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